Open Letter to Congress Regarding the Stimulus Bill

By Bill Smith on 12:07 AM

Filed Under:

ARRA News Service: Have you had enough of the stimulus scam. Below is a satirical open letter written by Laura Singleton. We wanted to help make sure her letter arrived. You can also help by sending Monopoly Money to DC, so that our "esteemed leaders" can fool around with it instead of OUR hard-earned money. She has asked if you'd send some too.

Here's what to do: send your elected officials monopoly money. How? Anyway possible: Email or Fax the image I've posted in my pics on this site. Put the image on your blogs. Mail Monopoly money overnight. Drop some off at their offices in your state or in DC. Blog about the waste, the pork, the delay & reference the Monopoly Money. Send out press releases, whatever. Flood their offices with the stuff. Maybe, just maybe, they'll get it then. Remember, the final vote is likely to happen Monday or Tuesday, so we don't have a lot of time. One voice is a dissenter. One million is a democracy.Monopoly Money for Politicians to play with!

Dear Esteemed Politicians,

I know many of you are new, and that the experience in our nation's capital can be both heady and confusing. Therefore, I'm writing to remind you that the Monopoly Money is the stuff that is pastel. Apparently, some (a "pared-down" $780,000,000,000.00 at last count) of the citizens' real money has slipped into your wild game. Normally I wouldn't be so rude to point out this slight and obviously unintentional mistake. However (dear me, I'm blushing), it seems that our children and grandchildren will be responsible for this debt so you can buy:

$99,600 worth of doorbells in Laurel, MS (net jobs produced: 2)
$6M to convert hybrids to electric cars in Boulder (net jobs produced: 0)
$650M more for Digital TV coupons (net jobs produced: 0)
$70M in smoking cessation programs (net jobs produced: ?)
$500K for a dog park in Chula Vista, CA (net jobs produced: 0)
$600M for the Heritage Trail in Natchez, MS (net jobs produced: 65)
$1.5M for a Prostitute Shelter in Dayton (net jobs produced: 0)
$500M for Solar Water Heaters in Puerto Rico ((net jobs produced: 14)
and--(this one deserves an award for "stupid positions have consequences" posterchild)--$400M for testing and prevention of sexually transmitted diseases.

Now, I know that you know best, and I'm certain that this is all a misunderstanding. How could you know that the water company turned off service to somebody in our upper middle-class subdivision a couple of days ago? Or that there's a foreclosure sign a few houses away? My 70-year old parents came out of retirement to do substitute teaching after their life savings tanked. My brother's business deal fell through because of the economy & he's going to lose everything. But obviously no one told you that businesses here are going belly up and people are losing jobs. However, if it wouldn't interrupt your game too long, perhaps you could talk to any of these people--or me, for that matter--and find we'd actually rather have the money to get back on his feet than to pay to test someone who didn't abstain for an STD.

I know that Washington, DC is far, far away from here, but I would be more than willing to bring you additional Monopoly Money for you to play with in exchange for the real money, which real people could use for real needs.

Laura Singleton

4 comments for this post

A very thought provoking post. It's really sad what's happening to our economy, to honest hard working people, and the bailout to the bankers without accountability is a disgraced. Our hard earned money.

Posted on February 9, 2009 at 2:05 AM  

Well, all of the sheep voted for "change", and now we are certainly getting it.

I sure wish Mitt Romney were in charge.

Posted on February 9, 2009 at 11:57 AM  

Let me present a different perspective on this along with a suggestion about what might be more helpful.

First, as I understand the stimulus bill, it is directing money through existing channels to complete programs that various government agencies have wanted to complete but haven't had the funding to.

With that, various organizations submitted a list of projects they would like completed. One such list is from the U.S. Conference of Mayor's report. This list can be viewed, and commented upon, at

I first read about the now infamous doorbells on

Now, a few things that are worth noting. These are projects that have asked for funding. They are NOT projects that have been approved for funding. Laura is playing a little fast and loose with the facts. In fact, the stimulus package does not supply enough funds for everything that has been requested.

So, the real battle begins now. We need to look at each project, and contact the appropriate organizations to oppose those projects that are wasteful. At the same time, we should let them know about which projects are beneficial, and there are plenty of them.

At least around Connecticut, some of the most important projects are repairing bridges long over due for repair, and I hope I can direct money coming into Connecticut to help with needed repairs as opposed to projects that mayors around the state, and country have requested that don't help make our country stronger.

So, please, go to Find the good projects and support them. Find the bad projects and stop them.

Posted on February 14, 2009 at 10:22 AM  

Great post! Only people from Arkansas could make a showing against the stimulus bill if they set their mind to do it. How bout them hogs?

Posted on February 18, 2009 at 3:30 PM  

Post a Comment